Continuing the Craziness

This month has been a rather interesting one. I feel like I've been running around like crazy for most of it, and I know Kevin feels the same way.

I created a rather extensive "to do" list for the summer. I figured I needed things to keep me busy while being alone eight hours a day everyday of the week. Little did I know that I sort of bit off more than I could chew. Haha. I really wanted to make onesie vests and cardigans for this little mister. I have never sewn in my life, so I had my mother in law, Sherrie, show me the art while she visited us. After tackling it most of June and all of July, I can now say that I am done with the vests!! The cardigans are another matter... 

After our hotel stay for the night... idk why i'm in socks

My photography business needs a good kick off, so I decided I wanted to make my website for Eden & Me. That's still a work in progress though. Designing a website turns out to be hard... and I'm way too picky. I'm still trying to finish my online writing class as well. I should have known I'd lack motivation for an online class in the summer. Oh well.. I shall finish you! 

Crazy pool fun!

I wanted to learn how to can. So Rachelle took me on a raspberry adventure. We, then, got together and canned for an entire morning afterwards. Kev and I also got to go on a very.... memorable... camping trip with Rachelle and her girls. Any camping trip that ends in a hotel stay is a memorable one, I'd say.

Ok, so you're starting to see the craziness, right? I'll spare you more of my to do list, and go onto what's been happening!

Kevin's family reunion was held in Utah this year; which we thought was funny, because we live there and we had to actually travel because we are out of town for the summer! Haha. It was a long road trip for a 33 week prego and we ended up having a lovely flat tire, but, luckily with some help and God's grace, we made it and it was fantastic. It was nice for both of us to see and hang with all the Hinton clan. It was my first reunion with them, since we missed the one last year. They even threw me a baby shower while I was up there. It was just a fun trip all together. 

We then traveled back, and I hopped into a plane to Minnesota for a week. My mom and dad flew me out to be with Savannah one last time before her mission. I was spoiled again with another baby shower that my mom prepared for me as well. This little dude is already way spoiled and loved on both sides. I love being with family. Truly, the Celestial Kingdom is a place where families are together and not apart, because I can imagine no better a place.

While I was gone, Kevin had his Microsoft event! Although it was a rather stressful one compared to last year's, he still walked away from it with a smile on his face. We now have some pretty cool tech gear that Kevin has been thoroughly enjoying for the last few weeks. 

Upon returning to Washington, Kevin and I celebrated our 2nd Anniversary. I know it was late.. but we wanted to do something big, and so we waited to be able to have an entire weekend of fun. We went to the San Juan islands! We had to take a ferry to get there, and we stayed in practically a closet... but it was worth it! It's all about the adventure! We went sea kayaking, which was my favorite, and we saw a porpoise! We also walked to a lighthouse, and saw a very well done Twelfth Night play in the woods. Oh and I just have to throw in that we saw, up close and personal, 8 deer, 1 fawn, and a baby  red fox! If you know the nature girl inside of me... you know that just that alone makes the trip worthwhile! It was fun to be with the hubby seeing and doing something entirely new for the both of us. 

After a night at the hospital,
we found out everything is fine!

Any who, that's been our one of a kind summer thus far. Lots of running around and projects. As for the baby boy, he's been growing! He gave us a scare six weeks ago, and I was hospitalized for 24 hours. But because of that, we now have no fear of whether he's doing ok or not. He's a moving and happy little man, and we cannot wait for his arrival. Although, I'm nowhere near ready for it! Need to get back to Utah to start my nursery constructions!! ;)

Now enjoy some pictures.... because we actually have quite a bit from the last month or two! Oh and they are not in order of how they were taken.

My handsome man staring off into the ocean

A beautiful site from where we started our sea kayaking

Us being our crazy selves..

Forgot about our big concert fun!
Yay for Christmas presents in June!

The beautiful lake that was right next to our hotel that we got to
enjoy the next day

Our companions through it all!

Fourth of July togetherness!

Flat?! NOOOO good

Animal ridin' with my niece at the Family Reunion

So we like flirting with ourselves sometimes, especially when we are
sitting in a car for two hours for a ferry ride

Just continuing the love... again we waited for quite a few

San Juan... you are beautiful

Our San Juan closet for the weekend!

kayaking

My bathing suit doesn't do much complimenting, but hey we needed a pic!

Shakespeare under the stars... super fun!

A Touch of Eden

So I decided about a month ago that today's post wouldn't be like many of my other ones. Today, I just want to try to fully express myself...

One year ago today, a baby arrived into Kevin and I's family. Our firstborn. My husband and I knew that our son wasn't going to come to Earth for any lengthened amount of time. The doctors had all warned us that there was no way the baby could survive, and, in fact, I remember one doctor telling us that she could and would abort the baby the next day if we so desired. But this was our baby. We wanted this baby to live and we knew it was alive. We loved it, no matter what. After public tears and private tears, we decided to wait for our miracle.

Our Little Miracle Arrives!

The Lord has said that if you ask, you shall receive. He has never let me down with that statement. I found myself in the weeks to follow, in a gulf of humility. I never thought of myself as boastful or prideful, but I never knew what true humility felt like. You feel so powerless, yet hopeful. I'd be lying if I said most of my prayers were not for my baby to be healed. I was so hopeful that he would be healed. I promised to love my baby, I promised to teach what was right and to be patient and endearing. I promised to read my scriptures everyday and never forget to pray. Beyond the promises, I petitioned the Lord too. Asking, what I had done to deserve something like this? Had I not woken up for 6 am seminary every day? Had I not been a good enough friend to someone? Had I not been married in the temple? Had I not kept my covenants, prayed, fasted, and searched the scriptures? Did I not love my family enough? It just didn't make sense, I deserved this miracle. I sacrificed so much of my 20 year old life for my Heavenly Father, why would he abandon me now?

I don't know the answers to everything, and I'm not claiming to, but I'm telling you... God knows what he's doing and don't doubt it, be faithful. The doctors had told us that our baby had one week at the most to live when we found out he was sick. My son, Eden, ended up living for another two months. I spent most of those two months praying for him to stay longer, and every week at our ultrasound he just continued to get worse. But I loved him, and I wanted him. I loved his little heartbeat, and I worried about the day I wouldn't hear it.

About the time I finally accepted God's will for Eden and my little family, Kevin and I went to an ultrasound where they could no longer find his little heartbeat. Eden had passed through the veil and was no longer with us. Both of us, after two months of trying to prepare for this, wept in front of everyone that day. I hate crying in front of people, I'm one to try to laugh it off. And although I tried to make everyone feel comfortable with a smile through my tears, I couldn't fake my pain. We were to begin the labor process as soon as possible.

Family came to be with us for our little Eden Garth's arrival. I was 28 weeks along, so I would need to deliver him as any other baby. One year ago today, I was hooked up to pitocin and began labor for a little angel's body. He arrived in the evening, and I can't express the feelings of the moments that followed.

I can only say that I saw him. My beautiful baby boy. After months of worrying that I wasn't really his mother, and that he would never even know me, I knew, as I held him, that he loved me and was thankful for keeping him and sealing him as a member of our family. I saw my husband and our parents hold my baby, and love him. I fell more in love with the man I married as I watched him cradle a very special baby in his arms and love him as much as I loved him.

There are many points in life where I know I feel like the prophet Joseph Smith when he asked "Oh God, where art thou? ... How long shall [thy servants] suffer these wrongs... before thine heart shall be softened toward them?..."

And as the bleakness in life becomes what might seem unimaginable, the Lord comforts simply saying, "Peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment".

In the days that followed, I buried my perfect boy and found peace that I thought I would never again have. In the weeks to follow, I found out that I have loved ones and people looking out for me that I didn't even know I had. I have never seen so many people reach out to me. Some of those individuals did wonders for me.

For some reason we, as human beings, magnify our bad days. Good days are never good enough, but boy are those bad days bad. Although I had plenty of bad days, after having Eden, I have had my share of great ones as well.

We are so blessed in this world, all of us. I was blessed a year ago to have my Eden join my family. God didn't abandon me when He sent me a special little one and didn't heal him. He was blessing me with a chance to find the miracle I needed. I love my son more than I thought was possible. Sometimes, I really can't believe I survived losing him... because when I found out he was sick, I thought it was something I couldn't bear. Here I am though, and Eden is patiently waiting for his crazy mommy and daddy to make it to the Kingdom above.

I can't imagine the pain God felt as he let his Son, Jesus Christ, die for others. But I do know that I would've done anything to save my son, and how selfless and all-knowing God must be to have held His hand for the sake of us all. He gave me and Kevin a son to love, and a promise: that if we do what is right and endure to the end, we will get the opportunity to raise him someday. I am comforted in my Heavenly Father's love and know that this experience was to shape me and my husband. We needed to be molded to be become better individuals. And how grateful we are for the opportunity that we had to be shaped by a little angel like Eden.

Happy First Birthday, my dearest Eden Garth!
You have helped me see the world in a new light and have taught me more about life and living than anyone. You showed me that I can do hard and seemingly impossible things. Your father and I love you more everyday.

Another Package

After finding my last post, which was written in January and not published until May, I figured I needed to get back on the blog!

Many things have changed since I last wrote. My resolutions of getting lean this 20-14 went out the window fast, as I found out I am once again pregnant! Although this news brought an emotional roller coaster for both Kevin and I, we now are only elated. Having done the tests needed and having had "professional" ultrasounds, the doctors have told us that this little one will be joining our family here on Earth! The 20 week ultrasound got rid of a lot of fears, although I'd be lying if I said I don't have any more.

And in case you haven't heard, we are having yet another BOY!!! I knew it was a boy beforehand, yet again (mother senses), but this really throws off the fictional family picture I always envisioned growing up. I always saw myself with a bunch of girls like my mom, but it seems my actual family has two boys leading the way! I don't know how to raise a boy. I'll admit it right here. But as long as Kevin is there to help me, I'm more than willing to try my hand at it! I can't wait to see this little guy, and I know I'm not the only one. I've been told by several nieces as well as my sisters, that they CANNOT wait until I have my baby. Haha. Looks like he's already famous. I guess that's what he gets when he has such an amazing big brother like Eden.

The school semester ended finally. I didn't know whether to wish to be done or wish it to never-end. However, my stress level was becoming rather crazy, so it just had to end. The year I had waited for since coming to BYU is over. The year Savannah and I would be together going to school. We had a blast. I had forgot how nice it is to have a girlfriend to hang out with all the time, especially a sister. I miss her and already know she will be an awesome missionary to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (yes, we're Mormons). She got her mission call to Santa Rosa, CA - Spanish speaking! She will serve for 18 months, goodness I'm gonna miss her!! She will come home to another member of the family (baby #2) as well as being able to whisper Spanish secrets with Kevin.

Kevin has been working hard. Since I stopped working, he has done a fantastic job at providing for this little family at home. We are now in Redmond, WA for his Microsoft internship again. Although the living quarters are darker and definitely not my ideal, Washington is as beautiful as ever. Kevin is on a new team in the Skype division and, from what I can tell, likes what he is doing so far. Love that man of mine!

A week before coming out, we got to visit my family again! They are all growing up too fast. Never. enough. time. They are my best friends and I love them soooo much! Next time I see them, I will be holding a baby! How's that for crazy?! Kevin and I had fun with each and every one of them... we both already miss them.

Sarvey Family is ready for this little BOY to join the family! 

Gonna Be Lean this 2014!

Here's to another New Year! School naturally took its toll last semester, and our posting became nonexistent. So yay for another fresh start!

Currently, I've been super absorbed in the photography program. I never really left the darkroom last semester, and this semester looks like it's going to be the studio. I'm ok with that though, as I am learning a ton. I now consider myself a photoshop wizard (soon to be guru), and I know one or two things about film. This semester I conquer lighting. Should be fun!

Kevin has been really working hard in that major of his as well. He spends long hours on the computer both at home and at work. Luckily for me, he always tries to get his work done in a timely manner so he can spend the rest of the time with me. He's now a part time student! Which means he's so close to being a graduate!! One more year!!

Meanwhile, both of us have been having fun YOLO-ing it up. We hang with my sister, Savy, almost everyday and whether we are watching Arrow or out on an adventure, we have fun! :)

Snow Castle Adventure

Thanksgiving was spent at the Sarvey's this year! It was so wonderful to be with family again, there's really never enough time to give when it comes to family!

Christmas was spent at the Hinton's this year! The same can be said there as well, there just is never enough time! We are so blessed to have such amazing families on both sides!

With the coming of the New Year, Kevin and I decided that we would make some resolutions. We have some things in our lives that we really felt needed to change, so we took the first step in doing so. Kevin is now working out everyday, and eating healthier. While I... eat what I cook, which is healthier because Kevin wants it to be. We both read our scriptures actively, as we now have a goal to finish certain books in a time frame. So far, Kevin has kept his resolutions very well and I am still working on them! This year has been a great one already!